Well we had one for Miss Snark so now we will move on to our next Despairing Happy Hour. Here we will have one for The Rejecter.
The Rejecter - whom I have come to really like and respect in these past few days - and have begun to understand her need for staying anonymous, (and my sincere wishes to her for a speedy and complete recovery - the woman has courage to be respected!) - has the following as an introduction on her blog:
The Rejecter - I don't hate you. I just hate your query letter.So here is one for all of you who think they will ever make it past The Rejecter and her ilk. You should be so lucky!
I am an assistant at a literary agency. I am the first line of defense for my boss. On average, I reject 95% of the letters immediately and put the other 5% in the "maybe" pile. Here, I'll tell you how to get past me.
So you are planning and outlining your New WIP? This one is going to be great. Land the best Agent and hit the top of the New York Times Bestseller Lists!
You have it all planned don't you?
Spent years writing that Great Pulitzer Prize Novel? And those dumb agents and publishers just don't see the genius of your plot? They tell you the characters are wooden and one-dimensional? No dice. No sale. And you look back on all those days where you had just had coffee and smoked 3 packs of cigs. day in and day out, in sacrifice of it all? And now you turn around, your spouse has abandoned you, the kids won't talk to you and you are old and gray with nothing to show for it?
Nothing like a little Regret!
All illustrations above are from the Despair.com. All hyperlinks on the posters will take you to their original page @ Despair.com.
Don't Be Cheap! Leave A Comment Below. I Promise Not To Bite!